Sunday, March 1, 2009

Maybe it's the underwear!

First of all, let me yell this one:

I completed MY FIRST 10-MILE TRAINING today! Woo-hoo! Go me! Go me! Do the Cabbage Patch! Actually don’t, cuz you’re sore as hell! Ten miles. Cool. The most exciting part is that it really wasn’t that hard. I suppose that is a good sign since it’s only a sixth of the 3-day. Toward the end, my quads were burning but I definitely felt like I could do more. And even now, sitting at the computer, I feel okay. It is when I get up from the computer that I can feel those 10 miles! When I do get up, the first ten steps or so are certainly not graceful and they are accompanied by “Ooo, ahh, eee, uhh, ow. oh.”

So what was the most important thing I learned on my first ten-mile training day? Was it that I have really come a long way in my physical fitness over the last year? Nooo. Was it that I can do anything I put my mind to? Nooo. Was it that it is indeed the shoes? No. I learned why it is that Michael Jordan went from selling sneakers to underwear! Even more important than a good pair of sneakers to this kind of training, is the right pair of underwear! I had on the complete wrong underwear during every step of those ten miles today. Let me tell you, blisters are one thing, but chaffing…not fun!

There is nothing like extreme weight loss coupled with aging and having carried 2 ten-pound babies to get you thinking about underwear. Any woman (I am assuming this doesn’t apply to men, but I guess one should never assume) who has ever gone out for a night on the town in some Spanx knows you put them on BEFORE hair and make up. This is because getting into them involves more pushing, pulling, contorting, grunting, and sweating than your average Pilates class. They really do make a difference, but you do pay for it! My last outing in a little black dress cost me more in undergarments than in actual dress. And then there is the permanent organ damage, I mean, that flab all goes somewhere, right? The aforementioned night on the town landed me in a picture in Bill Brett's "The Seen” section of the Boston Globe, so I am grateful I was all sucked in nicely. And in the picture, you can’t even tell I wasn’t breathing.

So obviously underwear is an important consideration when out for the evening, but since my weight loss, I have really been on a quest for the perfect everyday underwear. I will try not to venture into the realm of too much information, but when I find them I will let you know. I am praying it is before the 3-day! For now, I am off to powder my rear.

Thanks for reading. More later…

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